A lot has happened since July, but that is the truth of anyone without possession of a time-stopping device or Alzheimer’s. Mostly, I have been rethinking life, reprogramming myself, and meditating.
Not meditating under a Joshua tree or a Bikram yoga loft in SoHo. Conscious breathing has had nothing to do with it; in fact every so often I tense up and have to remind myself to take breath.
Detachment was not based on the abandonment of materialism and flings with Nirvana but via a process of learnt humility. Rather, the allowance of giving my self permission to accept that there are things beyond my control, to let go of more, and have faith in that the universe has an incredible knack for provision.
Provision oddly enough occurs when one has apparently lost all hope. It seems that faith to the faithful works like that of an ethereal pituitary gland; just when you feel you have no where else to turn and are at your wits end about to go Faust, the universe responds with a fresh dose of answered prayers.
Prayers by the way are also not offered according to the letter of the supplicant but rather as a series of opportunities that one must be attuned to pick up on and respond to.
Exemplum hodiernus:
Prayer:
Oh Lord, please bless me with a break from work in a cooler place; make be braver, more warm hearted, selfless, open-minded and bring someone into my life.
Answer:
You get stuck in an unheated elevator on your way to work, with a mange stray kitten and wait all morning for the fire department while dealing with your claustrophobia.
How it works:
Four hours later you are rescued and you call the office to explain and are given the rest of what would have been a 13 hour work day off; you were given the opportunity of compassion which you responded to by keeping the kitten warm; answering your desire for warm-heartedness.
You become more open minded during the second hour when you decided that cats weren’t so bad after all. The selfless thing was answered when you decided to adopt the feral flee bag.
After 45 min of claustrophobic hyperventilation, you realize that you are going nowhere soon and have to learn that tight spaces other than those found in a significant other aren’t as bad as your Freudian short comings make them out to be, but that is yet to be seen considering the cute EMT who slipped you his/her cell phone number.
Halleluiah…?
test
Hey papo... Its been a LONG time since I have seen u post something. I see that u have been thinking about things. Thats always a good. AT times we need to disconnect ourselves from things & reflect our lifes for a while.
I hope that all is good with u! Have a great one papo.
lol a day in ur shoes...
whats up bro happy new year! =]
glad to see ur good we gotta chill sometime...
Luis,
Beats your high heels Lou-Lou...je je
Mike,
I hear you bro. Glad to see that you are doing well. Cuidate
Hey pa...Seems you got a lot on your mind. Well you know I am always here for you. See you soon.
E-Dot
somehow i still manage to set myself up lol
wow...it seems like you are definitely re-evaluating your life and thinking about what's important to you...
that's probably one of the best ways to find YOU and reflect on where you've been and where you are going?
{does that make sense? it's early and i haven't had my morning coffee yet so im alternately prickly, spacey, and ultra evil right now..wait...that's me ALL the time! ;)}
but, you will be fine..take the time you need to THINK and REFLECT...and go from there.
would have loved to have met you before i left the big apple..but, hopefully, ill be back sometime this year...killing brain cells as a staff writer for a network tv show! :)