It was a bad day. I daydreamed most of the hours. I made no money, felt sick, sad, stressed, wanted to implode, felt empty, alone, lost and aware. I also felt hate, anger, self pity, compassion, joy and a great many other things. I felt tired of more than my day. I envisioned a future detached from the moment, these feelings, -this day.
I kept to myself except when I sought you for comfort and got the expected. I found the detached ambiguity of one who’s uncertain. I smiled. How can I blame you? I felt the same. After all, today was a bad day.
Yet, I faced it with humility. I smiled the day through, despite the fact that I ached at the soles of my feet and inside where Tylenol does not work.
I missed my mom, my bed, my pajamas, my cat, almost my train but mostly not caring. I ordered Japanese and two bites later, asked the waitress to wrap it.
I slept on the train and escaped for a minute. I escaped, not reality but just that one moment.
I was caught up in systematic cycles, like thinking over and over that I wanted tomorrow to be here. Funny enough tomorrow will be for me as today could have been. But, I scammed myself. I robbed myself of today by means of dismissing it. I should have embraced it, but in minutes it’ll pass.
What’s one to do but smile it away? As I have done all of today.
damn.
you sound like that guy did on "Super Size Me".
been eating any McDonalds lately???
=0)
I prefer not to do McDonalds. It was just a less than favorable day.
It passed.
isn't it always worse when you're an artist? no numbers to crunch, nothing dry and logical to distract your mind from the feeling of not-rightness. you're right; it passes. for a while.
It always passes, just as it always expected and right around the corner.
C'est la vie...